Betty Baker Strikes Again

So... my, naturally-beautiful, does-nothing-wrong, "skinny-as-a-pickle", super-mom, wonder-nurse, balls-of-steel sister has started to blog. What can I say, it is like a communicable disease. First Princess Jessie Pants, then Choirpres and Soundguy, then me, now my mom and then, because my mom is, my sister. It is an epidemic. Blogging: the new influenza. I digress.

My sister, Teed (a name that I bequeathed to her many moons ago when her given name was more syllables than my small mouth could handle), has started a blog. Check it out: http://www.teed-blahblahblog.blogspot.com, she claims not to be as talented or funny as mom or me, but she lies. I blame that on her large, curly hair (the mommy with the big hair, as her youngest son describes her) -- sometimes it puffs up so big that she must not be able to actually SEE that she is the "good one" (that aught to get mom going, right?). I digress, yet again (story of my life).

In her initial posting she aptly points out that I have a lot of opinions. Any reader who knows me knows this to be as painfully true as the self observation I made a few months back: "I'm a little high strung". In fact, during my first review at a former job my supervisor noted that "Sh ehas a lot of great ideas, insights, and opinions and she is open and willing to share them freely!" (or something like that). This is the nice way to say: "She is opinionated and a loud mouth." I'll take it, better that than meek and mousy, right? Thought this was another digression --- ha! Fooled you. It is NOT. Just the frame work for the rest of the story (you see, I tell a story like you are supposed to work on a puzzle, set up the frame work with the outside edges and then pick up pieces and try to fit them together....damn, I digress...don't I?).

SO, anyway...Teed pointed out that I am opinionated, and while it comes as no surprise I take that observation as a challenge to use my blog today for something potentially useful. Below, please find two new recipes. Both of these are my variations on sweets ('cause that's what I prefer to spend my time in the kitchen making) that I heard about or read recipes of but never wrote down. If you need a nosh for the weekend - try them out and let me know how they go. Perhaps one or both of these will sound good and stay down PJP? Keep on trucking, the first trimester is almost over, I'm told that it gets dramatically better in the 2nd trimester (though, what the hell do I know?! My hormones are so irregular that I might as well be 13 again!)

Happy Reading, Happy Baking, Happy Weekend.

~Phoenix

S'mores Bars
Just when you thought summer was over and you'd have to pack up the S'mores supplies until next year - try this out instead.

Ingredients:
1 large bag of mini marshmallows (about 8 cups)
2 sleeves of graham crackers
2 chocolate bars
1/4 cup butter

Directions:
Butter or grease (use your "fat" of choice) a 9x13 baking dish. Cut or break graham crackers into 1x1 inch-ish squares. Cut or break chocolate bars into pieces.

At a medium heat ('cause NOTHING smells worse than burned marshmallow) combine butter and 6 cups marshmallows in a large sauce pan. Stir frequently until butter has melted and marshmallows are smooth. I recommend you use a non-stick pan and a non-stick spatula for this process, it makes clean up much easier.

Remove from heat and add graham cracker pieces. Fold to coat. Fold in remaining 2 cups marshmallows. Finally, add chocolate bars.

Dump the ooey-gooey-goodness into prepared baking dish and pat down 'till it is even. Let sit until cool. Lick the pan and the spatula. Slice and enjoy.



Aunties Indecisive Cookies
What are they, peanut butter, chocolate chip, oatmeal? Ala Phoebe from "Friends" ..."what the crap is up with this stuff....oh, it is good, may I try another?!" (Who can tell me what she's talking about? A free batch of cookies for the first reader who can identify the sweet to which she is referring.)

I know they look like they don't know what they want to be (hence the name) but they really are pretty tasty. Not to mention that if I had a regular cycle I'm sure they'd be a great PMS cure. Salty and sweet is good, right? How would I know - my reproductive system is messed up.

The nut butter gives a (this will come a shock) nutty flavor and is my favorite alternative to nuts (in my opinion nuts don't belong in baked goods). The oats make the cookie more robust and chewy. I have listed ways to make these "friendly" for people with diabetes, diary, nut, and gluten allergies 'cause it would SUCK not to be able to eat sweets and it is SUPER easy to make accommodations so we can all enjoy (a little shout out to my high-maintenance-food-yet-lovably-allergic friends).

I like to make the batter ahead of time, roll it into balls, and freeze it. We cook a few each night in the toaster-oven, 'cause what's better than a warm cookie? OMG, enough...the recipe already!

Ingredients:
1/2 cup butter or margarine - softened
1/2 cup peanut, almond, cashew or other nut butter (omit, obviously, if anyone has a nut allergy)
1/2 cup brown sugar (you can use less or a sugar substitute if you prefer)
1/2 cup granulated sugar (you can use less or a sugar substitute if you prefer)
2 eggs
1 tsp. vanilla extract
1 cup flour (whole wheat, all-purpose, gluten-free...doesn't matter)
1 cup oats (what ever you've got around, use Irish oats if making these gluten-free)
1 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. salt
1 bag (yes, the whole bag, this is what makes them good) milk chocolate chips (or what ever type of chocolate chips are your favorite)

Directions:
Preheat oven to 350.

Cream butters and sugars together until smooth. Beat in egg and vanilla. Set aside. Sift flour, oats, soda, and salt together. Add dry ingredients to the butter mixture. Once combined, stir in chocolate chips.

Form into balls (I like to use my melon baller for this 'cause I've got a touch of OCD and all of my cookies have to be a similar size/shape. However, if you aren't certifiable I'm sure you could do the "drop by rounded teaspoonful" thing that recipes always suggest -- seriously just "drop" them and that's that? How uncivilized.).

Place on cookie sheet (or baking stone if you know where its at) and bake for 8-10 minutes until golden brown. When possible serve warm.

For some added calories and fat ('cause sometimes that's just the way we roll) drop a couple of cookie balls into a ramekin and bake until just barely cooked (almost light brown). Remove from oven and top while hot with ice-cream or soy-ice cream. Called "Bazuike and Cream" and SOOO good.